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Steve Martin Quotes: 18

  • A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

  • Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way.

  • I did stand-up comedy for 18 years. Ten of those years were spent learning, four years were spent refining, and four years were spent in wild success. I was seeking comic originality, and fame fell on me as a byproduct. The course was more plodding than heroic.

  • I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.

  • I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.

  • Boy, those French! They have a different word for everything.

  • Thankfully, persistence is a great substitute for talent.

    Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life
  • Writer's block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.

  • I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if you set out to make art you're an idiot.

  • You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.

  • I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.

  • Be so good they can't ignore you.

  • I understood that as much as I had resisted the outside, as much as I had constricted my life, as much as I had closed and narrowed the channels into me, there were still many takers for the quiet heart.

    The Pleasure of My Company
  • I've got to keep breathing. It'll be my worst business mistake if I don't.

  • I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper.

  • It's so hard to believe in anything anymore. I mean, it's like, religion, you really can't take it seriously, because it seems so mythological, it seems so arbitrary...but, on the other hand, science is just pure empiricism, and by virtue of its method, it excludes metaphysics. I guess I wouldn't believe in anything anymore if it weren't for my lucky astrology mood watch.

  • Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you'll be a mile away and have his shoes.

  • He gave her his phone number, in a peculiar reversal of dating procedure. She might have considered kissing him, even after the horrible first date, but he just didn’t seem to know what to do. However, Jeremy does have one outstanding quality. He likes her. And this quality in a person makes them infinitely interesting to the person who is being liked.

    Shopgirl