Janet Evanovich Quotes: 21

• We don't appreciate the value of humor sometimes.

• You can get through very serious and sometimes horrible and sometimes embarrassing and very awkward situations with humor. It gives us a way out.

• Is that a bulletproof vest? See, now that's so insulting. That's like saying I'm not smart enough to shoot you in the head."Eddie DeChooch

  Seven Up

• Romance novels are birthday cake and life is often peanut butter and jelly. I think everyone should have lots of delicious romance novels lying around for those times when the peanut butter of life gets stuck to the roof of your mouth.

• Nice dress. Take it off.

• Either get out of bed or else take your clothes off,"he said. "I'm not in the mood to compromise.

• I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble.

  Twelve Sharp

• She'll be back,"Ranger said. "But not tonight."[Stephanie] "How'd you get her to leave?" "Told her I was gonna spend the next twelve hours ruining you for all other men, and so she might as well go home."I could feel the heat rush to my face.Ranger gave me the wolf smile. "I lied about it being tonight,"he said.

  Four to Score

• Babe!

• Men drive off bridges and drink too much because of women like you.

• I ran three miles, staggered into the lobby, and took the elevator back to my apartment. No point to overdoing this exercise junk. --Stephanie Plum

  Two for the Dough

• I don't have a lot of domestic instincts,"Ranger said to me, his attention fixing on the unidentifiable glob in my hair, "but I have a real strong urge to take you home and hose you down."I went dry mouth. Connie bit into her lower lip, and Lula fanned herself with a file.

  Eleven on Top

• I think that some books are more successful than others to certain readers. People who read my books for the humor, they're going to love one book. People who read my books for the mystery, they might not like that book quite as much.

• I don't need handcuffs to enslave a woman."-Ranger to Stephanie

  Hard Eight

• If I gave you a pity position it wouldn't be in my office.

  Eleven on Top

• Ranger locked eyes with me. "Please,"he said.Tank and Hal were goggle-eyed. They weren't used to "please."I wasn't used to it either. But I liked it. Okay,"I said. "Be careful. He's insane.

• He [Ranger] peeled my [Stephanie] clothes off and wrangled me into bed. And then suddenly he was inside me. He once told me that time spent with him would ruin me for all other men. When he said it, I thought it was an outrageous threat. I no longer though it outrageous.

  Hard Eight

• [Ranger] "How's your mental health?"he asked. "I heard about Soder."[Stephanie] "I'm rattled." "I have a cure."Oh, boy.He put the truck in gear and headed for the exit. "I know what you're thinking,"he said. "And that wasn't where I was going. I was going to suggest work." "I knew that."He looked over at me and grinned. "You want me bad."I did. God help me.

• My grandmother is a little Cuban woman who cooks all day and speaks Spanish. Your grandmother watches pay-per-view porn." "She used to watch the Weather Channel, but she said there wasn't enough action."-Ranger and Stephanie

  To the Nines

• I'd spent a night with Ranger a while ago, and I knew what happened when he was encouraged. Ranger knew how to make a woman want him. Ranger was magic.

  Eleven on Top

• Excuse me?"I said, palms down on the Formica tabletop. "Coffee? I thought we came here for pie." "I don't eat the kind of pie they serve here."I felt a flash of heat go through my stomach. I knew firsthand the kind of pie Ranger liked.

  To the Nines