Authors — Quotes

Garrison Keillor Quotes: 11

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
Humor has to surprise us; otherwise, it isn't funny. It's a death knell for a writer to be labeled a humorist because then it's not a surprise anymore.
Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.
A book is a gift you can open again and again.
I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.
When in doubt, look intelligent.
The French have a new president, the British will soon have a new P.M., and we envy them as we endure the endless wait for this small dim man to go back to Texas and resume his life.
A young writer is easily tempted by the allusive and ethereal and ironic and reflective, but the declarative is at the bottom of most good writing.
Evelyn was an insomniac so when they say she died in her sleep, you have to question that.
Pontoon: A Novel of Lake Wobegon
Some luck lies in not getting what you thought you wanted but getting what you have, which once you have it you may be smart enough to see is what you would have wanted had you known.
Lake Wobegon U.S.A.
When you wage war on the public schools, you're attacking the mortar that holds the community together. You're not a conservative, you're a vandal.
Homegrown Democrat: A Few Plain Thoughts from the Heart of America